:: sweettalk ::

:: Thursday, May 08, 2003 ::

God, I offer myself to Thee to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self that I may better do Thy Will. Take away my difficulties that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of Life. May I do Thy Will always.

Oh, that You would bless me indeed and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would always be with me, and that You would keep me from evil.

Thank You for keeping me sober today. Amen.

The change from storm and winter to serene and mild weather, from dark and sluggish hours to bright and elastic ones, is a memorable crisis which all things proclaim. It is seemingly instantaneous at last. -- Henry David Thoreau, Walden

I believe the storm has passed. Although I was a bit irritable at times yesterday, overall my mood and attitude were much better than they had been in the previous couple of weeks. As I reflect on my past, I remember that I often endure a crash or some sort of of a depression after a period of sustained activity. I don't know that I would call myself manic during most of March and April, but I definitely was more active than usual.

The physicians at Sierra Tucson diagnosed me as manic-depressive in 1995, but I took myself off all medication at the end of 2000 as it had numbed my emotions completely. Even with the unpleasantness of the past couple of weeks, I'd much prefer to weather the ups and downs of this disorder in return for the ability to feel my feelings. Life isn't the same without them. I made those people closest to me aware that I was going off my medication and asked them to tell me if they saw any of the warning signs. So far I've survived.

I met with Doug and Cynthia at GE yesterday, and we decided what needed to be done for me to complete the fixed assets project. I believe they're going to keep me a while longer to look at inventory and WIP (work-in-progress). That should take me quite a while. I don't really care as long as they keep me busy and give me something like reconciliations where I have some sort of control. Their site is near home, and I like the people. Both of those things make a world of difference to me.

After work, our Rebellion Dogs study group met at T.G.I.Friday's to select a new member and prepare for the next three months. I was so glad to see all of those guys. I've missed them and our meetings so much. As a group, we chose Chuck, and Theo's going to ask him if he'd like to join. I like Chuck, but I don't know him very well at all. This will provide me a chance to get to know him better. We're going to go through the Twelve Traditions in the 12 & 12. I think this should be interesting.

:: Kyle 6:40 AM 0 comments
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