:: sweettalk ::
the musings and minutes of the committee meetings in my mind| [::..about..::] |
|---|
| :: age: 41 |
| :: ancestry: english, scottish, irish, german, french |
| :: education: finance, real estate, sociology, economics |
| :: gender: male |
| :: home: dallas |
| :: orientation: gay |
| :: politics: libertarian |
| :: religion: christian |
| :: sign: pisces |
| :: species: homo sapiens |
| :: status: single |
| :: vocation: financial analyst/grad student |
| [::..recommended..::] |
| :: cybertheo |
| :: ethnic lounge |
| :: fate delivers |
| :: my quiet life |
| :: the search for love in manhattan |
| :: truck808 |
| :: usinpeace |
|
| [::..neighbors..::] |
| :: sometimeshappy |
| :: force of mouth |
| :: computer academic underground global headquarters |
| :: no smorking |
| :: serial experiments |
| :: radical wacko |
| :: archipelapogo |
| :: random thoughts from a large head |
| :: brilliant corners |
| :: communications paradigm shift |
| :: evaporated |
| :: prairie point |
| :: unadulterated text |
| :: time runs with an ax |
| :: portia of venice |
|
|
| [::..reading..::] |
| ::
came to believe by alcoholics anonymous |
| ::
twelve steps and twelve traditions by alcoholics anonymous |
| ::
the alchemist by paul coelho |
| ::
dune by frank herbert |
| ::
the death and life of great american cities by jane jacobs |
| ::
wherever you go, there you are by jon kabat-zinn |
| ::
if the buddha dated by charlotte kasl, phd |
| ::
atlas shrugged by ayn rand |
| ::
we the living by ayn rand |
| [::..listening..::] |
| ::
time & tide by basia |
| ::
buena vista social club by buena vista social club |
| ::
born by bond |
| ::
michael buble'
by michael buble' |
| ::
time out
by the dave brubeck quartet |
| ::
dvorak: 3 great symphonies
by antonin dvorak |
| ::
a day without rain
by enya |
| ::
crazyhorse mongoose
by galactic |
| ::
joao voz e violao
by joao gilberto |
| ::
town called earth
by greyboy allstars |
| ::
josh groban
by josh groban |
| ::
synkronized by jamiroquai |
| ::
turnstiles
by billy joel |
| ::
come away with me by norah jones |
| ::
les miserables
by les miserables international cast |
| ::
solo para ti by ottmar liebert |
| ::
the best of matt bianco by matt bianco |
| ::
listen without prejudice
by george michael |
| ::
trickle by olive |
| ::
piano concerto no. 1/ rhapsody on a theme of paganini by sergey rachmaninov |
| ::
wish by joshua redman |
| ::
what's new by linda ronstadt & the nelson riddle orchestra |
| ::
seal by seal |
| ::
duncan sheik by duncan sheik |
| ::
...all this time
by sting |
| ::
mercury falling
by sting |
| ::
under the covers
by dwight yoakam |
| [::..links..::] |
| :: all consuming |
| :: biz stone, genius |
| :: blo.gs |
| :: blogdex |
| :: blog matcher |
| :: dive into mark |
| :: extreme tracking |
| :: globe of blogs |
| :: technorati link cosmos |
| :: weblogs |
| [::..archive..::] |
:: Tuesday, October 28, 2003 ::
depression
God, I offer myself to Thee to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self that I may better do Thy Will. Take away my difficulties that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of Life. May I do Thy Will always.
Oh, that You would bless me indeed and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would always be with me, and that You would keep me from evil.
Thank You for keeping me sober today. Amen.
Only one endowed with restless vitality is susceptible to pessimism. You become a pessimist—a demonic, elemental, bestial pessimist—only when life has been defeated many times in its fight against depression. -- E.M. Cioran, On the Heights of Despair
During depression the world disappears. Language itself. One has nothing to say. Nothing. No small talk, no anecdotes. Nothing can be risked on the board of talk. Because the inner voice is so urgent in its own discourse: How shall I live? How shall I manage the future? Why should I go on? -- Kate Millett, The Loony-Bin Trip
Geez, if I could get through to you, kiddo, that depression is not sobbing and crying and giving vent, it is plain and simple reduction of feeling. Reduction, see? Of all feeling. People who keep stiff upper lips find that it’s damn hard to smile. -- Judith Guest, Ordinary People
If depression is creeping up and must be faced, learn something about the nature of the beast: You may escape without a mauling. -- Dr. R.W. Shepherd, Vogue July 1978
Yesterday started out well. I blogged. I was productive at work. But by the time I left work, I felt tired and depressed. I didn't go to a meeting again. I came straight home, undressed, got in bed, read a little, and then fell asleep for two hours. I awoke and heated up some dinner, read a little more, and eventually went back to bed. Have not heard from Allen in over three days, but that's actually okay by me.
I remember being happy and energetic and looking forward to things not too long ago. I can feel none of that now. At least I haven't taken a drink. That's all I can say for now.
:: Kyle 6:04 AM 0 comments
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